How “Relationships Repair Month” Started:
My friend Keith was getting at the end of the year and the holidays were coming fast. He was only going through the motions, believing that he was stuck in a meaningless marriage where he felt lonely and used. Then the thought came to him: what if he did something outrageous, silly, utterly different? He had already tried everything else.
But what would be different enough to shake things up for the best in his life? Keith was the first to try my new “Relationship Month” plan, and guess what? He was able to start some changes in his home life he would never expected to see….! Would you like to hear him?
“Every year when the bells sound for the holidays, I do a mental review of my year. Did I improve on myself? Did I reach the year’s goals? Did any issues become resolved? This year, some things had changed, but the same marriage issues were there, as they always were, year after year. Not because they weren’t important to me – but because I didn’t believe I could change things.
I thought about bringing flowers for Christmas Eve, even though I knew it was already too late to correct the course of action we had both taken throughout the year… and that left me with a sense of loss, as the time had gone by and nothing had changed.
Then Neil offered me a 4 week plan (he called it “Relationship Month”), and I saw that as very doable, with lots of support… So I said to myself, “ I have nothing to lose by trying, because I’m desperate as it is now. I need some goods ideas, and need to apply them fast… I tell you what, I’m glad I went with my gut!”
After trusting and completing my 4 week plan for renewing his relationship, Keith is now on the road to ultimate relationship recovery (and he had the best holiday season he’s had in years!) I’m happy to have helped him grow and mature in his relationship, and I would love to be able to help you, as well!
What Will You Learn During This “Relationships Month”:
More peace of mind (important for the holidays!)
Physical and emotional health (life without stress from toxic conflicts!)
Self-esteem (the confidence to move towards what you really want in life!)
Navigation of your own life (clarity about your life goals!)
How do we plan to do this change? Using two concepts:
Recover your Inner Power
In your heart, are you complaining about the lack of love and connection in your relationship? Want to change that into a deeply satisfactory connection? I need to tell you something, something you need to hear. Please, look inside yourself. Acknowledge this first: The empty love life you have now is the result of your own acquiescence.
You have designed your life in small unsatisfactory steps, and now you have a poor, unhealthy one. What happened? Well, you simply haven’t focused on the trade off: if you forget who you are, then you will get nowhere! Why do I say this? Because I believe that every human has the power to have the relationship that they so desire. That’s right: That means that if you don’t have the relationship you want right now, you can still aspire to improve it!
What’s really important here is that the reality of your relationship now reveals the quality of your relationship with yourself. Have you forgotten your life purpose? Perhaps you feel lost, like the clarity needed to reach your goals is out of reach; and worst, your relationship is not nurturing you to realize them!
YOU must reclaim your own power and strength, so that you can build something extraordinary for yourself within your relationship. Remember, a great relationship is where each partner is empowered, meeting personal as well as shared goals and aspirations!
But the recovered power mentioned here is not control or domination over your partner; it is the power to empower. By empowering yourself, you experience your life and your relationship at a different level than now; it is the quiet power of self dignity and worth. YOU set an example of how you want to be treated by treating yourself with the utmost love and respect!
When you become responsible for your own experience in LIFE, you will notice that the world relates to you in a different way. This means you have to stop complaining about what the other person does to you (hard to do, I know!) and begin focusing on how you can REFINE the messages you give to your significant other.
The Ability to Produce Change
If you are describing your partner as making of your life together a living hell, I hope will you listen to this next part. The reality is, you can’t make him or her change – the only thing you can do is change yourself. We’ve all heard that one, right?
But here’s a new idea: by changing yourself, you give your partner a whole new set of behaviors to adapt to! If you drop out of the vindictive behavior that makes each dispute escalate into war, and start sending a different message, it will be really difficult for your partner to continue behaving in such an aggressive way. Remember that behaviors that don’t receive the desired effect tend to change!
At this moment, what is your alternative? To continue living in such a way that the gap widens each day, and your dreams wilt a bit more? If you are still reading this, and still considering what I’ve said, then it’s likely that your relationship as it is now is not working! You’re looking for a solution, right? Your best way to begin is by considering how to change yourself; in doing so, YOU can change the environment of your relationship in such a way that it is forced to improve.
You need to begin living with dignity, respect and needs satisfaction to stop starving emotionally and really develop as a human being.
The Time is Now!
The holidays at the end of the year bring a general sense of hope and renewal. If you feel that your relationship is less than you need to have a happy, nurturing life and to get to be who you need to be, then be prepared to shake things up, just like Keith did!
Why am I inviting you to improve your relationship RIGHT NOW?
Because you have the right to experience a decent, nurturing relationship, and here, I will teach you how to get one!
Why am I proposing you dedicate an ENTIRE MONTH to it?
Well, this is the season of renewal! What better to RENEW than your love relationship?
THIS NATIONAL RELATIONSHIP MONTH PROJECT IS A FREE PROGRAM FROM CREATIVE CONFLICT RESOLUTIONS.
Follow this event on twitter: #RelationshipsMonth